Day is Night or Night is Day?

I started a post a few days before the arrival of the Raptor going on and on about being terrified and what if this and what if that blah blah anxiety. And of course, I don't finish nary a damn thing it's still sitting in the drafts folder. I know! Go get your surprised face. 

And yes this little Raptor completely owns us - well her and my boobs. SLAVE TO THE BOOB! BOW BITCHES. But my boobs are really her lackey so the hierarchy looks like: 

RAPTOR

Boobs

Laundry

Medela

MiT & RaptorDad

Let's jump to number 4 on that list - the Medela Breast Pump. It's my new best friend. Well frenemy really because while I get immediate relief when using, the maintenance is a bitch - washing, sterilizing, pumping, washing, rinsing, pumping. My boobs have their own zip code and they are policed by the teeny Raptor and the Medela. 

RaptorDad loves loves loves them. Not that he gets to touch but oh is he excited by them! I show my boobs to more people than Girls Gone Wild only I don't get to go to NOLA or Vegas or have tequila shots to lube me up. That's some bullshit. Whenever people walk into my house I announce the amount of boobage showing or holler a forewarning that while contained they will be out soon enough wreaking all sorts of leaking havoc and the ensuing WOMP WOMP WOMP of the Medela sirens are nigh. 

Truth be told, while breast feeding hasn't been hard per se I am not much of a fan. Granted it's been two weeks and we had some latching issues, but overall it's been...fine. I should probably hang in there and really not worry about it until I get on some sort of schedule but oh LORD my life with no schedule - AAAAAHHHHHHHH. Everything is all topsy-turvy and wibbly-wobbly.  This is normal right, RIGHT?! Sigh. I'm tired. 

The Raptor

She's lovely. 

All rosy pink with dark hair 

Yes, her scales are gorgeous. 

Stats: 

7lbs 

20"

Born at 1:46P on 1/10/14

Fun facts:

Csections hurt

Spinal blocks are awesome

Night nurses always suck 

Speaking of night, RaptorDad and I have no sense of it. Or day. Or time really. It's been 4 days. The raptor owns us. It's humiliating and not a little terrifying. 

Post ideas have been lowered to Tweet ideas and only about 1/4 of those make it through. I'm so swollen that the iPhone keyboard makes my sub-par writing look like English as my third language after Klingon and Swahili. Not even Apple can give me the ego boost I desperately need. 

Please excuse the lack of posting but enjoy the Tweeting! When I get around to it...if they're in English! 

Yeah. Ok. It's bad. I'll just be over there leaking and bowing to my new master.